An Update

It's been quite a while since I've posted on this site. I have been so distracted by other things and have also suffered what I'll call a writer's block. It's like I never have time to really think about something interesting to write. I haven't even been able to get fully involved in my reading. My mind is on other things. The beginning of the year started out with my cousin dying. It was one of the most heartbreaking times in my life. I still miss her and have days where I want to call her, but soon realize that I can never call her again. In June, my step mother died. Even before the burial my father was hospitalized. He ended up having a surgical procedure to unblock his arteries in his leg. His toe was in jeopardy for quite some time and we were back and forth to the doctor with that. He was also diagnosed with Alzheimer's and he suffers a severe B12 deficiency. The many doctor appointments and time spent sitting with him at his home have me tied up a good deal of the time. I still watch my grandsons. Every other week I have practice (I sing at church), and of course, every Sunday is church. And in between all of this I still have to go take my mother places...she doesn't drive. By the time I have a spare moment, writing is the last thing on my mind. So there you have it...

Hopefully, I will post again soon...in the meantime, please take time to look at this blog and to pray for this family...

www.thematthewsstory.com

I need to make a decision about what kind of plan to use for weight loss. I've tried doing things myself, but always lack the motivation and drive to accomplish it. I need some accountability. I know my food intake has to change, but I also feel that exercise is important. Some have suggested Metabolic Research (very costly). Others suggest certain gyms. I think I need a combination of both...

And So It Begins...

Last year was a pretty sucky year. One of the worst moments was losing my brother in law, David in August. He had been diagnosed with Lukemia (ALS) the last part of June, died August 15, 2009. With the year's ending I had high hopes that this year would be better. Those hopes were dashed when, from day one of the year, things have been going wrong. It would be bad enough if it were just those ordinary things that we all face on occasion. But this year started off with me being told my cousin had days to live. The family spent days by her side, grabbing every moment they could to love on her. She died on January 12, 2010 after years of battling cancer. It was a bittersweet moment. I have watched her suffer so much over the years, sometimes being right on the brink of death, only to suddenly have a turn around. But these past days reminded me that her suffering has never really ended. So her passing was a relief in the sense that, at least now she isn't suffering any longer. There's a country song by Toby Keith that says, "I'm not cryin cause I feel so sorry for you, I'm cryin for me." That's kind of how I feel right now. I know where Marie will spend eternity. She remained faithful throughout her ordeal. She continued to praise, to see the bright side. She was not a complainer. Marie brought humor to every situation, even making us laugh while we were crying inside. She was an encourager. I loved that woman! And now I cry because I can't pick up the phone and call her. I can't get in the car and drive out to see her. She was like a sister, a best friend to me. And I feel the loss. Is it selfish of me? Probably. But for now, I'm gonna be a little selfish and cry for me, for what (who) I've lost. I can only hope that in the days to come my pain will lessen. While Marie's life here has ended, her life has really just begun...so this is not goodbye, it's merely "Until we meet again."